Q&A With Meredith Rose*This interview was conducted with Bayreach, a student run health non-profit based in California. The questions were submitted anonymously through a survey conducted by both organizations. It is also available in 2nd newsletter. Read the original interview here
Meredith Rose is a Licensed Master Social Worker (LMSW) in the state of Missouri, currently pursuing licensure as a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW). She completed the Master of Social Work program at the Brown School of Social Work at Washington University in St. Louis with a concentration in Mental Health. Meredith has worked with adults, adolescents, and couples on a variety of issues including anxiety, depression, relationship struggles, life transitions, and self-exploration including work surrounding LGBTQ+ identities. Meredith is also a Kink-Aware professional (KAP), and offers a non-judgmental approach to working with members of these special communities. Meredith believes that the path with each relationship with each client is unique, but uses core values of acceptance and strengths-based perspectives to inform a centered, nonjudgmental approach with each client. She is particularly interested in considering the whole person (rather than isolated constructs which divide us up into parts), and often incorporates awareness-increasing tools such as meditation and mindfulness. 1. I’ve always been confused on what exactly an eating disorder is. Could it also include binging food? Broadly, when someone changes their normal eating patterns and it leads to physical health problems or makes it hard for them to function, they may fit the criteria for an eating disorder. There are six different eating disorders recognized by doctors and mental health professionals, each with distinct criteria, and in order to find out if you qualify for an eating disorder you must be evaluated by a health professional. Both Binge-Eating Disorder and Bulimia Nervosa involve binging food, which means eating an amount of food that is larger than what most people would eat in one sitting and a feeling of a lack of control while binging. 2. Are there multiple types of eating disorders? What are some warning signs to consider if you think a friend may need help? There are six different officially recognized eating disorders in the United States. Some involve eating nonfood substances (this is called Pica), others involve episodes of binging and purging, or intensely restricting food. Some things that might indicate you or a friend are struggling:
2. How can you help a friend who has an eating disorder? How should you bring it up in a conversation? If you know that your friend has an eating disorder, I would ask them what’s the best way you can support them. Your friend will know best what they need. If you’re not sure whether your friend has an eating disorder, but you suspect it, I would share what you’re noticing in them in a very nonjudgmental way. For example: “I noticed you didn’t eat your lunch yesterday and I’m curious what was happening for you” or “I noticed you have been exercising every day after school and I’m curious to hear more about that!” If you think your friends’ life is in danger you should tell an adult who you trust, like a parent, teacher, or guidance counselor. 3. Till what point is dieting and restricting food okay when I’m trying to lose weight? What are your reasons for trying to lose weight? I would talk with your doctor about any weight loss goals. Each body is different and has different needs. Teen bodies especially are growing a lot and need adequate food intake for proper development! If you are dieting or restricting food, what consequences do you notice of dieting and restricting? For example, do you notice irritability, tiredness, lack of focus? If the consequences are becoming distressing or interfering with your life, that’s a good sign that you might want to try something other than dieting and restricting food to lose weight. You might also consider changing your goal of losing weight to a different goal, like living a healthy lifestyle. 4. What is body dysmorphic disorder? A person with Body Dysmorphic Disorder can’t stop thinking about what they see as defects or flaws in their physical appearance (usually in their skin, hair, or nose, but could be any body part). The “flaw” appears minor or can’t be seen by others. The person will also do repetitive behaviors in response to those thoughts like checking the mirror, picking at their skin, or grooming, often for many hours a day. The person might seek out different cosmetic procedures to try to “fix” the “flaw”, but the relief is often temporary and their anxiety will resume again. Both the obsessive thoughts about their body part and the repetitions are upsetting and unwanted by the person experiencing the disorder. It is closely related to Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder. 5. Do genetics impact body image/ susceptibility to body dysmorphic disorder? For Body Dysmorphic Disorder, the DSM-V (the manual used by mental health professionals to diagnose mental disorders) states that people who are first-degree relatives of individuals with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder have a higher prevalence of Body Dysmorphic Disorder. With body image in general, a couple of studies have shown a link between genetics and body image. A Michigan study from 2012 showed that genetics influence a person having a “thin-ideal” (the acceptance of beauty standards of thinness). An older study performed in Australia in 2003 also demonstrated the influence of genetics on body attitudes. 6. What are some real life techniques to combat teenage body dysmorphia? I always am in a struggle between trying to love my body and hating it. If you think you are struggling with Body Dysmorphic Disorder, I would suggest talking to a mental health professional to help you work through it. Treatments for Body Dysmorphic Disorder often include cognitive behavioral therapy and medication. For other body image issues, I understand how hard it can be to struggle with accepting your body. Society pushes such a narrow idea of beauty on us that it can be hard to break away from that. Know that your body is perfect and beautiful exactly as it is. I try to practice radical self-acceptance every day. Here are some concrete ideas:
7. How can you deal with negative body image? What parts of your body does your mind negatively judge? First, notice that. For example, my mind tells me (because society spreads the message) that my body hair is gross and masculine. Once I identify the message from society, I notice how I feel about my body hair – and this changes from day to day, which is okay! I like to do little experiments with my body and the messages I receive about it from society. I’ve experimented with not shaving my legs, not shaving my armpits, not wearing any makeup, not wearing deodorant, and more. I notice how I feel and what my mind says while I’m experimenting. Body hair is something we can get rid of fairly easily if we want, but other parts of our bodies are harder or almost impossible to change. For things we can’t or don’t want to change, we have to work on acceptance. Acceptance means being okay with how something is, without trying to change it. If we can accept the parts of us that we can’t change, then we can even work towards loving and appreciating those parts. To take it back to my body hair, I can appreciate that it keeps me warm in winter. All this being said, I want to say again that each body is perfect exactly how it is, no matter what society says. You don’t need to change a thing to belong! 8. How do external factors influence body image? We aren’t born with judgments of our bodies – we learn them. We learn messages from our families, friends, media (like TV, movies, music), school, and our society and culture at large. Common messages I learned growing up include: thin is beautiful, fat is unhealthy, body hair is gross and masculine, straight hair is preferable to curly hair, skin should be even-toned, men should be muscular, women should have big breasts…I could go on and on. When people believe these restrictive and often harsh messages, it can lead them to do drastic, sometimes harmful things to try to make their bodies more accepted by society. The work is to identify the messages we’ve learned and decide for ourselves how we want to live our own lives. 9. How do I feel comfortable in my own skin? What is making you feel uncomfortable in your body? The first step is identifying what feels uncomfortable. Then, is there something you can do to make yourself feel more comfortable, or is this part of your body that you can’t change and need to accept? 10. To what extent are concerns about appearance normal? Is there a certain point when I should reach out for help? Living in our society, everyone learns messages about how their body should look. This causes us to be aware of our appearance. If your awareness of your body is causing you distress to where you are having problems at school, with friends, or at home, that would be a great time to reach out for some help. 11. Do you think dolls, toys, and cartoons characters (ex. Barbies) are impacting young kids’ body image, girls especially? Totally! Young kids absorb these images and messages without the ability to question them. They compare their bodies to how their toys look. Unfortunately, toys often have unrealistic body proportions, are overly muscular or sexualized, or only available in certain skin colors or hair types. We need more representation and visibility for all shapes, colors, genders, hair types, abilities, and every variety of person there is. 12. Does the media play a big role in body image issues for a lot of teens because I often find myself comparing my body to women I see on YouTube and movies? The media plays a huge role in people’s body image issues. The media gives us unrealistic expectations for how we are supposed to look. Also, there is very limited representation and visibility in the media. Additionally, I think that media portrays people in certain ways without giving us the “behind the scenes” access. For example, we see people with makeup on, maybe they’re wearing shapewear under their clothes, maybe they’ve dyed their hair, maybe they’ve had surgeries to alter their body shape or size, maybe they wax their body hair or do laser hair removal – and we don’t know any of this because it’s not presented to us. To be clear, there’s nothing wrong with doing any of these things! The media can just be deceiving because we don’t know what people look like without all these modifications. I sometimes struggle to know what’s “normal”, in terms of body hair, for example, because so many people remove their hair. When I’m struggling to feel validated in my body it helps to talk with my therapist or doctor to get a sense of what’s normal and human. If you have questions, feel free to contact me at [email protected]! Studies mentioned in Question 6: Suisman, J. L., O'connor, S. M., Sperry, S., Thompson, J. K., Keel, P. K., Burt, S. A., Neale, M., Boker, S., Sisk, C., & Klump, K. L. (2012). Genetic and environmental influences on thin-ideal internalization. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 45(8), 942-948. doi:10.1002/eat.22056 Wade, T. D., Wilkinson, J., & Ben-Tovim, D. (2003). The genetic epidemiology of body attitudes, the attitudinal component of body image in women. Psychological Medicine, 33(8), 1395-1405. doi:10.1017/s0033291703008572
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